


Let's Go Far Away...

by zedi



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Recreational Drug Use, Self-Reflection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-14
Updated: 2018-10-14
Packaged: 2019-08-02 04:50:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16298504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zedi/pseuds/zedi
Summary: Sometimes Louis wishes he was still a faceless lad from Doncaster posting covers on youtube that were average at best.





	Let's Go Far Away...

**Author's Note:**

> This was written to the narrative progression of the song Gay Pirates by Cosmo Jarvis, which I've wanted to write a fic inspired by ever since I heard it. If you're going to listen, fair warning that it makes me cry every time hahaha but I love it.  
> I have a different thing I wrote for the prompt "Restraint", but I think I'll just post that yo my tumblr  
> Not beta-d and written on my phone, so all mistakes are mine

* * *

 

Sometimes Louis wishes he was still a faceless lad from Doncaster posting covers on youtube that were average at best. When the articles and the fake narrative building and fucking _exclusives_ hit the public eye, he wishes no one gave a shit about it. Wishes they only paid attention to the music, the questions about what he's actually _famous_ for.

It's times like this, waking up in a hotel room next to Harry while they're both MIA and pretending they're no one, that he aches for it the most. Not when they're having to actively pretend they don't interact (even though they were in the same band for _five fucking years_ ), or even when management would commandeer his twitter account. No, it's when he can feel what it might be like to just be a man with the love of his life, that he wants most to be nobody.

But then those spellbinding green eyes will flutter open, finding and catching him in the love that spills out, and he remembers that he might not have this if he was still anonymous.

They eat breakfast in bed, legs twined together and voices soft, and Louis thinks of what it might be like if they could sit at a little cafe instead. God, if they were seen, if they were caught, he'd have to pay for it with a whole clusterfuck of new stunts to reaffirm how utterly “ _straight_ ” he is. Maybe even try to make him a dad again. Ridiculous. He just wants one day where he can take his boy out on a date. Is that so fucking wrong?

But then Harry giggles and shows him post after post of their other fans putting two and two together, dimpling and taking Louis’ breath away.

It can be reassuring, as well as a curse, to know that there's a large part of the fans that _know_ , that see through it all. After all, those same fans are the ones that point out how bad Louis is at not bleeding his love everywhere. Management has used their accuracy in the past as an excuse to refresh his media training, drill in behavioural corrections, run smear campaigns even. It's why there's people who think he's homophobic, a deadbeat father, the weakest member of the band.

Harry's been there, though, from the start. Cried about it because he's softer than he should be after years of the same shit. Still gets glassy eyed when they facetime before a stunt happens. Still so young for all this.

Louis will shoulder it, though, because it's either him or Harry who gets the full stunt treatment, and there's no fucking way he's letting anyone ruin his boy. They've fought about it, fierce enough that they're both in tears by the end. Those are the nights Louis hates the most, Harry clinging to him and sobbing out apologies even though it's not his fault. Neither of them is at fault.

This morning though they have a quiet day to themselves, exchanging kisses and rolling around lazily on the bed. Harry brought the good stuff, so they fall into easy shotgunning and letting the weed blur out their thoughts for a while.

They're safe in this room, the rest of the world locked away behind their door. The balcony is a dangerous temptation, if someone saw either of them lounging there, let alone _both_ of them...well. They'd return to the real world buffeted by damnations by their teams, stunts ready and waiting to clear the truth from people's minds. A new model for Harry to barely be seen in the same room as, some bullshit exclusive about how Louis doesn't even _know_ a Harry Styles.

He takes a long drag from the spliff and holds it long enough his lungs burn. Reminds himself that despite all that, he belongs to the man absently tracing hearts into his skin.

That's the thing about the punishment. Louis has it worse. He'll fight anyone for Harry's ability to barely be involved with the narrative they try to shape for him. They're both tied, hands behind their back, but when all is said and done Louis always hopes that Harry's hands aren't tied up as tight as his. The headlines and pap walks rush up to greet them like falling in the ocean, but Harry can slip free and pull Louis back to safety when the waves finally calm.

And that's what can't ever be taken from them. Cut their too long gazes from footage, belittle any signalling, bury all their history. You can't make them any less in love or supportive of each other. And it's starting to be less intense lately, he can talk about how proud of Harry he is in interviews, show his acceptance and support for lgbt+ contestants, prove without even _trying_ that Simon Cowell is a washed up bigot. They can still sneak away and rent a hotel room in some city and be nobodies for a day.

 


End file.
